Yes, I am Alive

Hello!  Just popping in to say "Yes I am Alive!"

I love you all and will be posting again soon......

Life sometimes brings lapses.

Rain

I love rain! I woke up late this morning, the house completely empty, with the exception of Samantha and Lindsey, who were sleeping. I awoke to a nice breeze whipping through the window, it felt like rain! It felt so good.... I felt so good to be alone too.... It's been so long since I've actually been Alone. I crave and love my time alone and this is the first time in probablly 6 months that I haven't had people by my side 24 / 7. I mean it! First I was staying with Becky, and sharing her house with the 2 of us and 5 "kids" (ranging from 7 to 24) and now I'm staying at Kevin's brothers house and Kevin and Bo are always at home.  Neither are working right now ~ which is very frustrating to say the least!

K did have good luck at an interview Friday and is supposedly going to take a drug test on Monday, meaning that he probablly got the job & Bo is disabled, so he can't work right now anyway. It doesn't look like I'll be there much longer anyway ~ which is a very good thing!

But back to the rain.  There's nothing like the sound of the rain pattering on a metal roof. It's heaven. Don't you agree?  I could have stayed in my solitude all day! Instead I got up, poked around, cleaned the kitchen and bathroom, did a load of laundry and then hung it out in the pouring down rain. (There is no dryer at Bo's...)

I'm sure I looked quite silly hanging clothes in the rain, but hey, the rain will eventually stop and they will dry when they want to. I can't speed things up or make them dry any faster... it's better than getting that horrible smell from laundry that has sat too long in the washer!

I forced myself to leave the solitude and... finally, after driving Lindsey home, headed off to work. I came in and an hour after arriving, got a phone call from a potential new landlord ~ which made my day! I'm about 90% positive that this house will be mine. It's far out... meaning far away from work....  but it will be set up as "Rent to Own"! Amazingly enough.... 

Rain... I love it!

Welcome to the Family!

I have a new cousin! Well, I guess actually he would be my 2nd cousin. My cousin Dylan welcomed Bryce into the world on May 14, 2008. Another Taurus - and only a few days before my aunt Colleen's birthday - which happens to be today!

 

Stop by and wish her a Happy Birthday and check out the New Baby!  

 Dylan and Baby Bryce (left)

 

The proud Grandmother, Colleen (right)

 

 

 

CONGRATULATIONS!

4 Generations

In honor of Mother's Day, I was trying to find a nice picture from previous blog posts of my Mother & I. I didn't have any luck, but I did find two photo's that are fitting. One of my Mother & my Daughter and one of my Grandmother and I. Four generations of girls!

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY SUNDAY TO ALL YOU WONDERFUL MOM'S OUT THERE!

And especially the wonderful Mother's in my life!

MY NANA & I!

 

 

 

 

 

 

MY MOTHER & MY DAUGHTER!

 

 

 

 

 Some Georgous Gal's huh?

The creation of Mother's

Hi all -

Long time no hear huh? I've been busy with my changing life, as usual. Lots of new stuff, yet nothing publically notable.  I've been well.

Last night was a tense one, hanging on the edge of my seat waiting for the "cheerleading decision"  - after an hour longer than we expected, we found out Samantha made it! She is officially on the Junior Varsity team, beginning her upcoming 1st high school year. I can remember well, being the same age, and not making it. I was heartbroken. I truly thought I was going to make it at the time...  but it wasn't meant to be for me.  I was however, the mascot of my aunt's cheerleading squad, so I guess that made up for it in some ways.

Another aunt of mine, sent me this today and I thought it was precious... and fitting for the upcoming Mother's Day weekend.

The answers below were given by 2nd grade children

Why did God make mothers?
"She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is"
"Mostly to clean the house"
"To help us out of there when we were getting born"


How did God make mothers?
"He used dirt, just like for the rest of us"
"Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring."
"God made my Mom just the same like he made me, He just used bigger parts."


What ingredients are mothers made of?
"God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and a dab of mean."
"They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think"


Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
"We're related"
"God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me."


What kind of little girl was your mom?
"My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff."
"I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy."
"They say she used to be nice"


What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
"His last name"
"She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?"
"Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?"


Why did your mom marry your dad?
"My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot."
"She got too old to do anything else with him."
"My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on."

Who's the boss at your house?
"Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball."
"Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed."
"I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad."


What's the difference between moms & dads?
"Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work."
"Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them."
"Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's."
"Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine."

What does your mom do in her spare time?
"Mothers don't do spare time."
"To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long."


What would it take to make your mom perfect?
"On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery."
"Diet. You know her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue."

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would
it be?
"She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that."
"I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me."
"I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head."

REST IN PEACE - TOBY BOY!

Intense Quivers

By: Samantha (my 14 year old daughter)

Dedicated to Toby

I sit here feeling all alone,

my legs shaking all the more intensely in every second.

I think about the memories we have endured and breakdown,

into a mess of tears.

I can barely see,

when I think that you will not be,

taking that morning ride in the car!

I feel numb and empty,

something’s missing.

When I think about how I will never again

see your eyes glow with the love that you have

Given us….

I only wish that love could go on forever.

When I wake up in the morning

and realize that this tragedy wasn’t a dream,

I will cry!

Because... I will never get your morning greeting...

Never again!

When I look at the things you left behind,

I feel like I can’t breathe,

I can’t think,

All I can do is remember!

When I think about where you used to lay,

under the pine tree,

I accept that I will never see you again

Laying there, content

Watching us so carefully

The feelings that come over me are intense

Overwhelming memories that

Invade my mind

I keep going back to it….

Presuming that you will never exist again

All I can do is

Remember all the fun times

And TRY not to dwell on

This heavy hearted truth.

But at this moment in time

I feel like the world around me is all a blur

Like the world has stopped

Like my whole world

Crashing down

I don’t know why

I could never understand

Why me?

The only thing I’m sure of

Is that you will

Always be in my heart!

All I have is memories

To last an eternity

To last forever

To last infinity

Come around please....

Watch over me please....

Remember me please....

Cheers!

My Toyota's fixed, finally! After all I've gone through with cars and trucks, running out of gas, stalking policemen (long story, different day ;-), it turned out to be a 30.00 timing belt and only a half days worth of work for Kevin. I thought the engine had blown, so this was a pleasant surprise! Now we've got the two auto's again! Yip yip!  

Yesterday, on my day off, we picked it up from James' house, after filling our faces at the chinese buffet. I drove the Toyota to work today, because it gets double the gas mileage than the truck! I guess I'll drive it Wensdays and Thursdays, when I'm usually close to broke. It feels so different from the GMC Jimmy that I am now used to driving. It's so low to the ground and the steering and brakes are alot more sensitive. I'll be going back to driving the car full-time after the 1st of May and will use the truck still, Fridays thru Tuesdays, when I have money for gas.

In other news, Samantha had her cheerleading banquet Monday night. It was a pot luck. The 8th graders brought desserts, the JV squad supplied the side dishes and the Varsity squad, the main course. All was very yummy! I love pot lucks because there is such a variety of things to try! They each got a certificate and Cheerleading T-shirt with the school's logo. Samantha and her friend Katy are going to a cheerleading camp at Virginia Tech. It will be taught by Tech cheerleaders and the end reward for joining is they get to cheer at a pre-game show for Va Tech Football. The girls, of course are ecstatic! Sami will be entering High School this year and she will be trying out for the JV squad next month.... She spent the evening last night outside practicing her jumps and gymnastic skills. I really hope she makes it. I think she will, myself, she's pretty good, but there's always that slight chance that something will go wrong and that would truly suck and she would be heartbroken!

     

Myers-Briggs Type Indicator

We had our obituary meeting yesterday, where we got the results of the Myers-Briggs Type test I mentioned that we were taking at work. I wasn't too surprized with my results and thought they were pretty accurate. It was fun, we went over the different results and did activities in small groups of the same personality "type". Plus, lunch from MacAdo's was a bonus! Here are my results:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The test reports preferences on four scales.

Source of Energy: Extraversion vs. Introversion.

Taking in Information: Sensing vs. Intuition.

Decisiion Making: Thinking vs. Feeling

Lifestyle: Judging vs. Perceiving

A Snapshot of my type: ENFP

In life: Warmly entusiastic, high-spirited, ingenious, imaginative. Able to do almost anything that interests them. Quick with a solution for any difficulty and ready to help anybody with a problem. Often rely on their ability to improvise instead of preparing in advance. Can usually find compelling reasons for whatever they want.

In the workplace: Lively, charismatic and encouraging, ENFP's work well when they can innovate and be creative, persuade others to action and stimulate positive change. They generate enthusiasm for startup activities, are tireless in pursuit of newfound interests, and anticipate the needs of people and organizations.

One Perfect Scene!

INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY???

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I went back in time and picked one of my older photo's for a few good reasons. Mainly, this picture stood out in my mind the minute I learned the topic for this Robin Challenge! Also because my camera is in storage and won't be free until the next "round" of Robin.

Oh, how I love this picture of my daughter Samantha and my niece!  It truly does say it all! It could be in a magazine.. their expressions are priceless and it just speaks volumes!

Now that my daughter is a 14 year old, sometimes it feels quite the opposite:  Guilty until proven innocent!  

A Story from Downtown

 

It's definately a Friday night! I work downtown and visit the sidewalk regularly for my hourly cigarette break. It keeps things interesting, if nothing else. During my last quick break, I about witnessed a kid getting completely demolished in a T-bone bicycle with car accident. Three young teens found it ever so entertaining to drive directly down the middle of Campbell Avenue on their bicycles! Sure, the empty road probablly looked pretty inviting at that age, with not too much traffic and people walking the sidewalks, but apparently they forgot that each city block has a cross street and totally disregarded street lights. As they were toeing that yellow line on their BMX bikes, a car came through the intersection, coming within fractions of an inch of hitting the middle boy. I'm not sure what the last boy did to avoid hitting the car himself, he must have been just that much..... more behind the rest. I almost screamed, but stopped myself, it was too far away to make a difference. I thought that I might have had a new obituary to write tomorrow.  Thank God, not. I did however manage to tell them, as they passed, that they need to watch their hind ends! Of course, they didn't hear me. The two riders who safely made it through the light were too busy telling the middle boy that he "about got creamed," in a joking manner!  I'm thinking he probablly didn't have much to say back and really just need to change his jeans.... It made me feel for their mothers! 

On my 40th! The first 13 from my 100 things about me!

Wow - I'm 40 today! 

1.    Christine is my first name, but I mostly go by Chrissie or Chris - in the blog world I'm Chris-sea

2.    Marie is my 2nd name and Sarah is my 3rd (confirmation) name.

3.    My Mom's name is Kathleen

4.    My mother's middle name is also Marie, or so we thought.  She recently discovered that her birth documents lists her middle name as Maria.

5.    I wonder if that means my middle name is Maria too?

6.    My father's name is/was Robert & his middle name is/was Frances

7.    I'm not sure if he is alive

8.    I am almost positive that he choosing to live as a homeless person in Hawaii

9.    I suppose if you were choosing to be a homeless person, Hawaii would be the place to do it

10.   The last time I physically saw my dad was in 1996

11.   We used to be very close

12.   We did not have any sort of falling out, he just hasn't gotten in touch

13.   I was conceived in Florida

You can read all 100 things about me by using the link on my left-side bar!

First Signs of Spring

The ROUND ROBIN CHALLENGE is "First signs of spring"

I had so much fun with this one and couldn't pick which photo's to use, too many goodies....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Spring or Fall, I can't decide which is my favorite, but it's definately one of the two. The first day of spring was upon us on Thursday! I find it hard to believe, I guess time really does fly. Days turn into months, which turn into years! Another spring upon us, my 40th. Thursday I will turn 40 years old! I do not feel 40, I thought I would be different at 40, I thought I would feel different, but I still feel like me! 

I am really looking forward to Spring this year. Winter wasn't very spectacular. Spending two winters in Massachusetts recently, has spoiled me to the awesome snowstorms and Nor'easters. In Virginia we didn't get anything, with the exception of a bunch of forcast mistakes from our local meterologists! I also spent a lot of time at Becky's this winter, meaning I was cold most of the time. She heats with Kerosene, in one room, which saves her money and does what is expected, but I've spoiled myself in the past, paying outrageous heating bills and having my home at a constant comfortable temperature, morning, noon and night.

I have no problem saying, "bring spring on!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wildlife

I am surrounded by beautiful countryside, tall mountains, fresh mountain air and of course wildlife!  Wildlife wanders around here, where I live, on a fairly populated mountaintop. It doesn't matter how many times it happens, it's still exciting when you spot that rare creature running free. The cow, who got out of it's fenced area and is grazing in the road, or the deer, running so close you could reach out and touch, are normal around here. Bigger and better sightings seem to happen often too! Everyone who live in these mountains have their own wildlife sightings of some kind or other. I grew up in the suburbs and I guess I never even considered such things as I grew up.

 

The other night, while driving with Samantha, we saw a cougar standing on the side of the road. It was about as big as my (huge) german shepherd, Toby, but was a cat! Since then I've been corrected, it wasn't a cougar but a mountain lion or a panther. Regardless, it was a BIG ass cat! 

 

I've lived on top of this mountain for about 15 years total and have seen a bear, a wolf, a smaller sized cat (of some type), families of fox and now my cougar. Don't believe they live here in Virginia?  Read about Cougars living in the Applachians.

 

Samantha saw the cougar first and pointed him out to me as we drove past. (The aftermath of her first sighting was interesting, to say the least). Cougar was simply standing on the side of the road, staring us down. It's times like these that I wish I could freeze frame life, so that I could share!  

13 Quotes to ponder

Life is so funny. It amazes me how much life changes when your thoughts do. One day I think the world is ending and the next the sun is brighter than before!  I appreciated all the well wish messages and just wanted everyone to know that I'm doing great again! Again I'm able to look back and know that there truly is a plan... It's having the faith that this will again be the case, that's hard.

I've put together 13 similar quotes and quotes I like for my 13 Thursday this week! You can click each quote to see "who said it".  (And yes, I am going to try to post 13's better than I have been).

 

1.       “One day at a time--this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful it will be worth remembering.”

2. “What makes life worth living is knowing that one day you'll wake up and find the situation that makes you happier than anything in the whole world. So don't ever lose hope and give up, everything turns out okay and the good guy always wins.”

3. “Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away”

4. “Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”

5. “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

6. “A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.”

7. “Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.”

8. “Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Appreciate your friends. Continue to learn. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is.”

9. Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.”

10.       “The human being who lives only for himself finally reaps nothing but unhappiness. Selfishness corrodes. Unselfishness ennobles, satisfies. Don't put off the joy derivable from doing helpful, kindly things for others.”

11.       “To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.”

12.       “Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.”

13.       “You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.”

 

The Chair and More

I love to play the Round Robin challenge but have been reduced to using my cell phone for the photo's because my camera is in storage with the rest of my belongings during my transition. The chair I choose holds my butt for most of the day, everyday. It's not that wonderful a chair, but I owe it some gratitude for being there when I needed it most!  So, without furthur ado, here it sits:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And now the More....

I just want to Thank the true friends & relatives out there that have completely rallied around me at this time in my life. I am going through a real rough spot right now, and it's really screwed up (to the max). I'm not going to go into details here, but know this, I am struggling, but also - thanks to those numerous friends, I'm making it and will survive.  Everything happens for a reason, even though you don't know the reason while it's occuring, there will come a time when you look back and say:  "aaah hah" and as the saying goes: Karma is a bitch!

Love to you all! 

Happy Saturday!

Happy Saturday!  I, as usual, am at work. Thank god I enjoy work because I'm here enough of the time. I just wanted to pop in and say hello. Everything in my life isn't exactally hunky dorey, work is about the best part right now, but it, Life, goes on as usual.

I'm on a house hunt again. Someday I'll find that perfect place, I'm just wondering when! My Mom is getting ready to visit. Her and my step-dad are traveling for the next two weeks and plan to stop by on their way back home to Massachusetts. I might just hitch a ride home with them.  :-)

Sending Love and will be back tomorrow with my Round Robin post.

 

500 Words

Created by the Love-Link

 

Why can't we all just get along?

At work last week my supervisor presented us with a Briggs-Myers personality test. Based on your answers to the 120 questions in the test, they give you a synopsis of your personality. What's your personality and what makes you tick? According to my supervisor, who is a very down to earth person, it takes one of each of the personalty types to run a succesful corporation. Sure, different personalities keeps life interesting, until, that is, it starts creating issues for no real reason. We are all very different!  Good, bad or ugly.... Some thoughts cropped up.

Are we taking this test due to the verbal knock down, drag out argument I had with a co-worker 2 weeks ago? This might be the case. We both have tremendously strong personalities, and probablly very similar. I finally had to stop biting my tongue, which I have done for close to a year now, and tell her how things were. Do they think taking this test is going to help? Why can't we all just get along?

Another verbal knock down, drag out occured the other night, with another friend of mine. Kevin and I were having fun with the test. I was reading the questions, he was guessing my answers. The friend decided to start talking a bunch of crap about the people working in offices, ie: the "corporate" world. I'm not sure if he realized that I am "one of them" - I work in the corporate world and it takes all kinds.... He thinks, and proceded to tell me bluntly and in no uncertain words, that I was feeding them information on myself. That they are analyzing my answers! That they would use these answers to determine whether I was a good worker or a good person.  This really pissed me off because he essentially was trying to tell me to fudge my own answers on my own personality test and it just struck a nerve. I'm wondering now if he thinks "corporate" is out of his league? He definately thinks of "corporate" as an authority figure? Why can't we all just get along?

I'm looking forward to getting my results. There were so many interesting questions. How much do you read? Are you the same today as you were when you were younger? How many hours do you volunteer in a month?

Volunteer? I remember what that is. I was homeschooled in 8th grade and one of Mom's ideas was for me to volunteer somewhere where I might be interested in working someday. I chose the Delmonico Nursing Home in Rockland. How many people actually volunteer these days? I'm thinking, now, that perhaps Samantha could get some good out of volunteering at an animal shelter or a vet.'s office. Her goal is to become a vet. Volunteering is good for the soul and we all should contribute  something.  It doesn't seem that many people do volunteer anymore,   including in my own life. There's just not time...  Why can't we all just "give"?

I was sitting in the truck, smoking a cigarette this evening and along walks a homeless man. I don't know if I've mentioned, but my real father chooses to be a homeless man on the streets of Hawaii (or he was a few years back, no one has had contact with him in awhile). We had a potluck lunch today and I packed up a bowl Chicken Chili, with cornbread! I rolled down the passenger window and offered the chili to him. He hadn't asked, was simply walking by, but accepted with glee and "blessed" me. I remembered my Daddy. I hope someone will do the same for him, because I can't. Why can't we all just "give"?

Have Gas, will Travel
Ok.  Maybe not.  My truck is sitting at the end of Becky's road, out of gas.  My truck, you ask?  Since when do I have a truck?  I haven't been posting so I haven't really clued you all in on the trials and tribulations of life lately.  The toyota died, leaving me to put a left-over Accura on the road, which also managed to die after two months, so much for cars built in the 80's. But actually, not, because I'm now driving Kevin's 1989 GMC Jimmy - a huge ass SUV, which apparently takes way more gas than I thought.  The truck runs great, but the gas gage doesn't work.  My original estimate was 25 miles per gallon.  I ran out of gas the first morning.  My next estimate was 20 miles per gallon.  I ran out tonight, 2 miles before I should have....  I guess I now have to live with 15 miles per gallon, in order to stay on the road and not next to it!

SHOES

Although I'm a little late with my Round Robin entry, I had my shoes all ready....

I actually had just gotten them the week before the subject was posted, so it worked out rather nicely for me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Better late than never.

What's your favorite?